How to Effect the Proper Behavior from Your Child

Proper outcomes as to a child's behavior is an interesting topic to a good many parents; since parenting is no easy task.  The following technique lends support in getting your little one to do as instructed, particularly at bedtime.

Step One:  Some of the following may or not apply to your past conditioning of your child as to minding you at bedtime, however, it is meant to share with you the proper and not so proper way to attain the best of behavior(s) from your child.  First off, never approach a child in getting him or her what you wish effected, by withholding love and affection.  In this regard, do not say:  "Do as Mommy (or Daddy) says; or I won't love you anymore!"  This is totally, the improper approach and can set your child up for neurotic behavior in later years.

Step Two:  Another example, which is not quite so drastic, as the example alluded to within Step One is to say:  "Do as Mommy says, or you  will not get to go to the Picnic tomorrow."  (Again, withholding the activities of the next day; or withholding love and affection, from everything I've ever read on the subject, is an absolute No.)

Step Three:  The proper approach is to assure your little one that you love him or her very much however, now it is (in the case of our example) bedtime; and in order to enjoy the day or event the next day requires your child to get his or her rest.  A good motivational way to effect the best results is to get your child to settle down in the following manner:  "Now Honey, Mommy (or Daddy) loves you very much; however, now is bedtime and in order to enjoy the picnic tomorrow requires you get plenty of sound sleep, Okay?  This means you must lay down and be perfectly quiet in order to get your rest so you will be at your best tomorrow."  Do you see how words used in this way do not threaten the child? In the preceding example, you deliver good sound advice that by your little one engaging in slumber supplies him or her with a coming day which he or she may more completely enjoy when well-rested.

Step Four:  Talk to your little one with ease; and not down to him or her as if speaking to a child requires you to do it.  In this manner, he or she will not notice some slight or distinction when it comes to your speaking to him or her as compared to your speaking to an older brother or sister; or, more significantly, another adult.  Children notice such differences.  They will see you speak to them; as it pertains to the proper method outlined here, as providing them with the same dignity as you would any older persons whom you wish to share information:  even if your child does not fully understand the message.  In other words,  he or she will notice how you say it. Speaking to your child in a respectful, positive manner yields (always) the best, possible result.

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