|Written by dawn gagnon|
First and foremost, I went to the absolute best source in finding out the facts for this article. My teen-aged daughter. She was more than willing to break it down in brutal honesty. Now she is grounded.
DON'T BE FUNNY-A teen is bound by a secret code never to find their parents jokes funny. Our clever witticisms will be met with a blank stare. Even if your joke was hysterical, a teen loses cool points if they laugh at what you say. A Teen that does laugh, more than likely are laughing at you, not the joke..
DON'T WEAR ANYTHING SIMILAR TO THEM-Age appropriate clothing is a must for parents. According to my daughter, there's nothing more pathetic than a mom trying to wear her daughters wardrobe. The biggest sin of all, is wearing acid washed straight legged jeans, and your polo collar flipped up..if you've been doing this and notice your teen won't acknowledge you in public, now ya know why.
NEVER TELL YOUR TEEN'S BABY STORIES- If their friends are around nothing will get you the teen "death stare" like bringing up the time your teen went to go make "potty" and fell asleep on the toilet.
IN PUBLIC, STAY A SAFE DISTANCE-Moms and Dads should never yell out "I love you pookie", or Give big ole wet kisses to their kids in front of others. Not only will you get the death stare, you'll get the "omg who is this Leper" reaction.
FORGET THE LINGO-If your teen asks you if they have to do the dishes before they can go to the movies..forget saying things like "Fo' Shizzle". By the way, the older the lingo is...the dorkier you are. I made the mistake of saying "word up" once...I'm permanently banned from using cool phrases now. For the love of all things holy, don't make up a cool phrase. That is the worst offense.
NEVER BUY YOUR TEEN CLOTHES WITHOUT FIRST CONSULTING -Want to waste money faster than a fat woman shows up at a sale on capri pants? (I'm a fat woman too, not to offend)...Buy your teens clothing without their OK, it's a sure fire way to have it go unworn in the closet. If you do buy their clothing, never ever say it was "on sale" or "on clearance"..it won't be worn for that reason alone.
FAMILY ALBUMS-Showing pics of your teen to their friends can be a huge no- no. The pics you find the cutest will most assuredly be the ones that your teen wants you to burn.
JUST BE YOU-It really doesn't matter what rules we follow, our kids are not going to view us as truly cool. What they do want from us is to be who we are, only,psst...not so much in front of other people..lol. Its really not important to be cool in your teens eyes. Whats more important is that you are respected by them and you set the proper examples for them. Don't worry, one day the roles will shift, they too will be the "uncool" parent, and you, now get to be the "annoying grandparent"..life goes on..